DEAR DEIDRE: I HAD brilliant sex with my wife’s flirty cousin. It was just a one-off but she now says she’s having a baby and I might be the dad.
I’m 37 and my wife is 35. We have three smashing children, now all in their teens. She is a teacher and I’m a mechanic.
We work very hard at our jobs and as a team on the home front.
Every Thursday I go to the gym in the local leisure centre to work out. But when I went there one week last month, the centre was closed due to flooding.
By chance I saw my wife’s cousin in the car park. She’s a good-looking woman the same age as me. She takes a Pilates class there and she looked really great in her exercise gear.
We stopped for a chat and I said I was sorry to miss out on my workout. She jokingly said that I needed some push-ups to get me in shape.
She said if I went back to her place she’d show me some Pilates moves I could do on my own that would get me more toned. We both knew what she was really talking about.
It felt a bit risky but I had an hour to kill, so we went to her house and I kind of pretended that I wasn’t me. We had the most fabulous workout in her bed.
I went home to my wife and hoped she wouldn’t find out the gym had been closed. I’m so sick with guilt I can’t sleep and I wish I could turn back the clock.
Her cousin is married with two lovely sons. We must have been out of our heads.
She has sent me a text to say she’s expecting a baby and says her husband is thrilled and assumes it is his.
She told me to not tell a soul what we did.
I don’t know what to do. I could be her new baby’s dad and it seems very wrong to keep quiet about that.
topic4today
MORE than 750,000 people in the UK are affected by an eating disorder including BED – Binge Eating Disorder.
My leaflet Coping With Eating Disorders can help sufferers and their loved ones.
Email me at problems@deardeidre.org or private message me on Facebook for a copy.
DEIDRE SAYS: It was very wrong of you to have risky sex with this woman when neither of you was free.
You may be the child’s dad but if her husband assumes it is his, it most likely is – but you may never know.
You need to take yourself out of the frame to think of what’s best for that child.
If you broadcast your guilt it could cause endless heartbreak for their family and yours.
Count yourself lucky her husband is thrilled with the news. Who knows? Perhaps this was part of her plan.
MOST READ IN DEAR DEIDRE
What made you go back to her house when you knew that felt risky and wrong?
You and your wife may work well as a team but there needs to be more in your lives than just work.
You need to take time out together as well to keep your relationship strong. My e-leaflet Relationship MOT can help.
NEXT IN TODAY’S DEAR DEIDRE My mother and stepdad deny ever arguing in front of me and laugh at my depression
READ DEIDRE’S PHOTO CASEBOOK Jasmine is enjoying a life of leisure with Vince and plans on spending his hard-earned cash on clothes
Get in touch with Deidre today
Got a problem?
Send an email to problems@deardeidre.org. Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.
Follow me on Twitter @deardeidre.